Real Talk Reflections with Myself
…on a run. My think time. As a said in a post ‘First with the head, then with the heart,’ from one of my all-time favourite books, The Power of One. I had good head-to-heart and then heart-to-heart with myself while running. I needed some time and some space from my race, and a little dose of reality (thanks migraine headache!) to remind me that I’m human, not so special, and part of something that is bigger than myself.
I have not been true to myself or my training styles. I have been chasing the Olympic Standard, to make an Olympic team, which is an outcome goal not a process goal. I raced for time, not to race, and I let go of the true reason I love to race; the raw, innocence, and love for running and competition.
On my run I let go of chasing Olympic Standard. Don’t confuse that with giving up. I am not giving up. I will be out there fighting, I will be working hard, pushing myself to always be a better version of myself, to always try to strive for something greater.
But I am letting go of the judgement. And not the judgement from anyone else but myself. I am surrounded by love, I am surrounded by an amazing group of friends, family, and coaches who all believe in me. A group of people who also know that I am so much more than just a runner.
I read a long time ago the statement “you are not defined by your successes or your failures.” I cannot remember where or when I saw it, but it obviously resonated in me and has stuck with me ever since.
No one will remember me for the times I ran fast or slow, for the races I won or lost. People will remember me for the impression I left with them. The impression I want to leave is one about passion for what you do, kindness and compassion for others, and empowerment of young people through sport.
My true friends and supporters will be there for me Olympic Games or not. They will support me and my love for running wherever my travels will take me. As long as I work hard, I am passionate about what I do, and I continue to support myself I know I am being true to what I believe in.
Sometimes letting go is the best thing. Again, not giving up, but letting go. Work hard. Love what you do. Believe in yourself. Be good. Support one and other.
Thanks Julia for the inspiration to get me thinking deeper about what matters to me, for getting me to think bigger than me, and for producing RunningOnOm.